A Nigerian father has stirred massive online debate after sharing an emotional and painful account of how his wife vanished mysteriously for ten years, only to return demanding to take the children she had long abandoned abroad.
The man, who shared his story through posts by @phveektordrayne on X (formerly Twitter), narrated that his wife left home under the guise of visiting her sister in Abuja and then disappeared completely, leaving him alone with their three young children.
After weeks of fruitless waiting and searching, he discovered through one of her colleagues that she had actually left the country entirely, and even more shocking was the revelation that her family members — including her parents and siblings — were fully aware of her plan but chose to remain silent, abandoning him and the children without remorse or explanation.
Ten years passed with no contact, no support, and no indication that she would ever return. During this period, the man shared that he took on the enormous responsibility of being both father and mother to their children. He described the difficult journey of raising the children alone — providing food, paying school fees, caring for them through sickness, and consoling them through the pain of missing their mother. He described the countless silent nights filled with tears, the overwhelming burden of single parenting, and the silent battles he fought to keep the family afloat.
According to him, he did not simply survive these years; he fought to give his children a stable and loving home, making sacrifices beyond what words could express. He emphasized that he did not have the luxury of complaining or giving up because the children needed him to be strong, even when he was on the verge of breaking down emotionally and financially.
Then, unexpectedly, in April of this year, the wife resurfaced. She did not come with apologies or explanations, nor did she attempt to mend her relationship with the children she abandoned. Instead, she announced her intention to take them abroad with her, expecting to uproot them from the only parent they had known for a decade. Despite his strong refusal, she insisted, arguing that the children "belong to her too."
Sharing his thoughts, the father said: “Ten years ago, my wife told me she was traveling to Abuja to visit her sister. That was the last time I saw her. We didn’t fight. There was no argument. No warning. She just vanished. She left behind three children, the youngest barely a year and six months old. I waited days, then weeks, hoping to hear something — a message, a reason, anything. Then I found out she didn’t just leave the city; she left the country. Her parents knew. Her siblings knew. They all kept quiet.”
He continued: “That day, I became both father and mother overnight. I bathed them, fed them, paid their school fees, stayed up through the night when they were sick, and cried silently when the weight was too much. I carried that burden alone. People talk about gender roles, but what role does a father play when he has to do it all? What role does pain play when there’s no one to share it with?”
He described how she came back not to reconcile but to “collect” the children as though nothing had happened, bringing threats and even allegedly sending thugs to intimidate him when he refused to give them up.
“Now, I’m being called wicked. Selfish. They say I’m standing in the way of my children’s future. But tell me — where was she when I was scraping together money for baby formula? Where was she when they cried themselves to sleep, asking for their mother? Where was she when I sat alone in hospital rooms praying for their recovery? Where was she when I was breaking?” he asked.
He noted that even the children did not want to see her, having grown up without any emotional connection to her and viewing their father as their only true parent. Yet she remained adamant, asserting her right over them despite their rejection and the pain she had caused.
“She says, ‘They’re mine too.’ But what does that even mean when you walked away for ten years? I’ve raised them with love, sacrifice, and consistency. Today, we’re doing okay. I’m financially stable. They’re in good schools. They’re happy. And most importantly — they feel safe,” he stressed.
“And now I’m the villain because I said no? So I’m asking: am I truly wicked for protecting my kids? Does a mother who disappeared for ten years still have the right to uproot them from the only parent they’ve ever known?” he concluded in a heart-wrenching appeal to the public.
His story has sparked intense debate online, with many Nigerians rallying to support him, praising his resilience and unwavering love for his children, while condemning the wife's sudden reappearance and attempts to claim custody.
